making the journey from panic to peace

 

words Lead Teacher Heather Baird, M.Ed.,

Contributing teachers, Melissa Lowry, M.A., Jennifer Randall and Patina

 

art Tane Beauvois

 

Just after the last of the turkey leftovers have been polished off and the first round of manic holiday shopping has been endured, or in my case avoided, comes a little-celebrated, and often-dreaded annual tradition: end-of-the semester teacher conferences. Having sat on both sides of the desk, I know that conferences can cause a great deal of anxiety and turmoil on the part of the parents and the teacher, especially when there is unexpected or unpleasant news. Whether your conferences fall just before or just after the mad holiday blitz, there is no great time to receive the news that your child's teacher has "concerns." Often, this rather vague and disconcerting information descends like a bomb into your lap and leaves you wondering, "What do I do now?!" 

 

While I am not one to deny anyone her fair share of tears and hysterical meltdowns, it is critical to remain calm. However awful the teacher's concerns may seem, it is not the end of the world. While it is important to take her comments seriously, a teacher's words do not contain the magical power to change who your child is. With or without a specific label or diagnosis, your child is the same sweet, lovable, quirky kid that she was a few days before. All you have now is new information. This information will lead you on a difficult yet transformational journey.

 

Classrooms are not made to bend and stretch as families are. However flexible and fabulous your child's teacher may be, there are limits to what she can do. If she has expressed concerns about your child, then as a parent, set aside your fears for a moment and take a serious look at this new information. Be very wary of waiting for your child to "grow out of" his difficulties. While waiting may seem like a safe and appealing choice, allowing too much time to pass can widen the gap between your child and his peers. Taking action is a loving choice. The following steps will help you journey through the first few days, weeks, and months after hearing that your child may possibly have a learning difference.

 

Step 1: Do not panic. Even the hint of a diagnosis or label for your child can seem overwhelming. You probably do not have a firm grasp of your child's situation at this point, but even if your worst fears do come true, there is always hope. Having a learning disability is life-altering, not life-ending. There are countless examples of highly successful adults with learning disabilities; many of whom would credit their success to the creativity, perseverance, and determination that their learning difference requires. Learning differences intensify and amplify the importance of one of the most critical jobs of every parent: to help provide opportunities for their child to learn, flourish, and thrive.